lesson on relationships

there's no place like home...

i've been away from home for the past weeks and i miss being there terribly. i miss my mom's cooking and my dad's random rants. i miss the eerie silence when i sleep at night. i miss my soft bed in my room. my bedroom probably misses being cleaned (haha!). i miss the feeling of being at home. nothing spectacular happens at home but that's my haven. knowing that i'm there, with my parents, the dogs and away from the busy city provides enough comfort like a warm blanket on a rainy day.

speaking the language of love

on this special day of love, i think it's timely to talk about the language of love. people who love each other go through a lot of misunderstandings because they speak different languages of love. love is a universal thing but manifests in different ways.

according to dr. gary chapman, there are actually five basic language of love - each varying in style but conveying the same feeling - love.

1. receiving gifts - if you are type of person who appreciates receiving gifts and consider it as a sign of affection, then this is your love language. if you are with someone who is having a hard time with his finances or someone who is stingy, you may get the feeling that you're not being loved.

2. spending quality time - this deals not only with proximity to your partner but about focusing your energy on your partner. you may be together in one room but you don't interact with each other... it's not exactly lovespeak. quality time involves sharing day to day experiences, listening and sharing. if you understand your partner's emotions, the more that your love will grow.

3. providing service - some tend to provide physical acts of service as a manifestation of love. washing the dishes, cleaning up your room, or even doing little favors show humility and loyalty because they do those things without a sense of obligation. people who love in this manner appreciate reciprocal acts to ensure a healthy relationship.

4. saying affirmation - there are those who are vocal with their emotions. there are people who would shower you with compliments, constantly provide you encouragement, give advice and obviously thsi is their love language. maintaining open communication with these type of love speakers would guarantee a stronger bond.

5. touching/feeling - many enjoy the company of their partners when they have physical contact with each other. holding hands, hugging and kissing are very concrete examples of this type of language. usually this language would occur during the "honeymoon phase" of any relationship, but gradually lessens through time. if your partner is very responsive to your touch, it may prove better than any gift or verbal affirmation that you give in one lifetime.

some people may have just one distinct language and some may have many. but what is essential is to know what your love language is in order to make your relationship last and to make loving...well, lovelier.